Solution for Stinky Smelly Favorite Things

I live in constant fear that my Charlie will lose his “square”. It is a little, light blue mini-blanket given to us as part of a set when he was born. I don’t even remember putting it in his crib. (Please don’t tell CPS I put anything in his crib. According to the rules, babies must sleep in a big crib with nothing to snuggle.) I could have nightmares about leaving Square on a plane or in the park. It is his thing.  He needs it to sleep, to recover from an injury and to get over a tantrum. I would rather lose my engagement ring. His twin brother developed a mild, temporary attachment to a brown bear. The passion burned hot early but it dwindled quickly. Now, he can take or leave the poor bear which, while not the kind of man I want him to be, allows me to sleep at night. As any parent of a kid with A THING will tell you, it takes on a life of its own – literally. This thing can probably jump out of the crib and go for a walk. It smells like it has legs. The odor coming from it is so pungent, I have to breathe only through my mouth when I approach his crib in the morning. I have washed it countless times, both by hand and in the machine. I have tried every kind of smelly and fragrance-free soap. I have ordered two new ones but they haven’t arrived. Just when I was about to give up, Glenn Close appeared before me. If she can boil a little girl’s favorite bunny, then I can certainly boil Square. It wasn’t easy. I almost wimped out and just put it to simmer but then I got another whiff and turned up the heat. Keeping Charlie far away from the kitchen to avoid years in therapy, I added dish-washing soap and lysol. I let it bubble for a good 15 minutes and what do you know? Square is as fresh as a flower. I am sure it will be only a matter of time before she is again contaminated because yes, I put the boys to bed with a bottle – shhhhh! But, now I know how to whip her back into shape – stovetop style. It was a risky move, but one I had to take for the good of the whole family. Thank the gods of all Things – it worked!

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